At last?
Finally it happened. I´m leaving. It sounds kind of weird, since when I knew it, after the first feelings of relief, I got scared. Now what? I asked myself. But, strangely, I have started to stop thinking about what´s next. I only want to stop. To breathe. To stop worrying about everything. I won´t miss the things I´m going to leave behind: no friends, no valuable relationships, no good moments. Nothing. Perhaps this is caused by me. I didn´t want to have any of them. I used to think that I was “better” somehow, and that I didn´t need to go down to their level. It was too basic, I used to say. Damn. Now I realized that perhaps I have missed a lot of good moments, but, it´s too late. The only thing remaining is the will to move on. Again. To try and fight my daemons. But I´m starting to realize that they will come with me, no matter where I am. I have to defeat them. Better yet, I should make friends with them… Interesting thoughts. Are they possible? Or am I slightly mad, like Freddy said?